Blondes are noticed- REDHEADS are never forgotten.

Diary of a not so average redhead....
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Woman calls and said we sent her the wrong size-we sent a 32C she said she ordered a 32G (all done online). So I look up her order and the item she ordered and tell her (nicely) that the item she ordered isn’t made in a G. So she starts to argue with me (still complaining we sent the wrong size). I told her that unfortunately, she is responsible to get it back to us as the error was not ours. She said “I don’t care..even if the mistake was mine you’re supposed to do whatever you can to keep me happy and keep my business.”… I said ” Um no, the error was yours and we are not responsible for the error you made.” She then called me a “piss-poor excuse for customer service” I said “thank you and have a good day” and hung up on her. I got her return last night and this is what is said:

  • Stop being a F$cking Idiot!
  • So we send this lady an email confirmation after she submits an online order. In the email it lists her item and next to the item it says “back ordered until 8/25”. She then forwards me this email with her own personal note at the top:
  • "where’s my order? did you ship it yet? why do you guys take forever.”
  • I would love to respond with:
  • Dear Bimbo
  • Do me a favor and scroll the f$ck down!
  • Sincerely,
  • Customer Service

You’ll all be happy to know that my favorite full of shit customer emailed me today to let me know that she & her husband had twin boys and she is already pregnant and showing again! I’ll have to congratulate “her” and see if she responds. She never answered my last email-that made me sad. She doesn’t care about me at all… anyways, here’s her latest email. I fixed it so that all of the letters aren’t running together (and I still have no idea why she types in all caps)

HI WELL  I THOUGHT I WA GETTING BACK INTO MY BRA. I HAD TWIN BOYS NINE WEEKS AGO. ALL IS WELL SO HUBBY AND  I HAD OUR PRIVATE TIME JUST AFTER THEY WERE BORN.  SO HUBBY GOT INTO BED BESIDE ME. WELL THINKS HAPPENED AND WELL I AM PREGNANT ONCE AGAIN AND BELLY IS SHOWING.

I added a page for some retail tales. I started with 10 things I hate about you….customer. Will be adding to this page as I go.

xoxo

Mistress of Darkness

Renee Ann

You should be smart enough to track your own package. At least 10 emails a day I answer go like this:

I get a forward of a shipping confirmation we sent & the first line is either “Where’s my order???”, “Where’s my stuff?”, “I ordered this five days ago, have you even shipped it yet?”, “People, I placed and order and want to know where it is? What’s the hold up?” - I assume you get the picture.
In all of our shipping confirmation emails (except international) is their name, shipping address, and TRACKING NUMBER WITH A LINK TO THE WEBSITE TO TRACK THE PACKAGE. Please…please explain to me WHY….WHY they go though all the trouble of forwarding me the whole email to ask in their nicest way to find out where their stuff is when all they have to do is click on the link that says TRACK or copy & paste it? Are they that lazy that doing this is too much for them to handle. Are they just idiots? This is a complete waste of my time. My dream response would be:

Dear Ms/Mrs Lazy Pants,
Thank you for your order. As you can see by the title of the email you were nice enough to forward me (yet not sharp enough to read), this is a SHIPPING confirmation so to answer your question, yes your order has shipped! Whoopie! Where is your stuff….well it’s on it’s way to you! Do I specifically know where it is-well probably in a mail truck somewhere who the hell knows! We don’t install Lojack on our packages (sad but true). Oh wait…. here’s a nifty idea!!!! If you scroll down the email you sent me you will notice a really long number and a link. CLICK THE FUCKING LINK! It does this magical thing-it will track your package for you. We send this to you so you could track your package yourself-not so you could send it back to us and make me do it. Put down the cookie and track your own shit.
Sincerely,
Me